We are the product of our collective experiences. Many of my experiences growing up included a complete lack of control/say around any life decisions. As you can imagine this turned me into a force to be reckoned with later on in life — I am the Queen Bee of Control Freaks. It served me well (and sometimes still does). I don’t give up. I fight for everything I want. I push myself hard. I’m unafraid to do whatever it takes to get the outcome I *think* I want. But here’s the thing about that:
My past is impeding on my present and I am fixated on my future.
Also, I’m EXHAUSTED. Imagine that, it’s exhausting constantly trying to remain in control of every possible scenario, conversation, and situation!
Mindful living is largely reliant on living in the present moment and letting go of control. That’s the irony of it all, control over one’s life is largely a misconception because so much is out of our control. I grapple with this day in and day out. I’ll keep convincing myself that I will let it all play out the way it should, but…then…I won’t. And, through every effort that wasn’t met by any response at all, it fuels the fire of needing to control the situation.
I’ve been working through some affirmations and pledges that I’m hoping will help me (and hopefully all of you) in letting go:
Acknowledge the thought and let go.
I hear this and move on.
No one is taking any control away from you, you are choosing to step back and away and let go.
Shift your focus.
Happiness sometimes means letting go of the life we imagined.
There is freedom in accepting what can’t be changed.
Perhaps this is the ultimate mindfulness lesson — to learn how to wrestle and conquer this bear to be truly present in the moment. To learn how to climb over this mountain with tools I’m learning how to use.